Hmm.. I've been counting the days.. after recovering from depression that I've had since 2004. All these while it's been so difficult for me to manage my state of health. Now I believe that to be happy, we need to take care of ourselves before others and I always put others first, which is actually my weakness. Letting go of the one person that I love was the most terrible thing that I did. I've never expected that I would suffer a very great loss in my life. Maybe it was not meant to be... I gave up on him just because he was seeing somebody else.. I thought maybe he wasn't happy to be with me that made him do such a thing.. and that I wasn't spending much time with him. Sad.. Yeah.. the relationship wasn't meant to be.. :( All these things make me think about what I've been through in life.. I'm still finding life so complicated when we have to deal with relationships and breakups.. So, i'm still counting the days when I will find the one special guy.. Insyallah.. :)
I met with several of my old friends, classmates and even former students asking me the one particular question, i.e. marriage. Well, most of my former students are happily engaged, a few are already married with several kids now, and almost all of them are attached with someone special. I can count only a handful of my friends who are not married and not yet attached to somebody. Everybody would say that the single ladies are all choosy or ignorant, or just don't bother to get into a relationship. Wrong answer!!! We are only human and we need someone to love and take care of us. We also have feelings and it's kinda sad if people mistakenly thought that we are those who never smile at other people or not friendly with others. They never know that deep down inside every single lady is a kind heart, a caring soul who would never give up trying to get people to understand their nature. It is as if watching a movie where only the popular girls would be asked out on a date, while those unpopular ones who only read books and very shy would not be asked (or perhaps guys would not want to date them). So, do you think that these unpopular girls are choosy? or.... let me see... who's the one being choosy? Good question, right?
Like most of the time when friends come over to comfort you after you have settled down or you're done with the breakup issue, they raised the issue that you are the one having the problem and not the guy or vice versa. Well, does that mean if the guys who broke up with you got married after dumping you, the fault comes from you.. Poor thing!! It is sad when people make judgements about other people. But does those people who judges, knows what's going on and what actually happened? It's not easy to make or please people. They only thought that if a guy dumps a girl, then when either one of them marries another person, the other single person who stays unattached with anyone, is the one who's at fault. Of course, either one of them is happy or perhaps both of them are happy. But people usually look at the one who stays single as being choosy. Ah... what am I writing here...???
I guess I'm just too stressed out and I'm still counting the days when I finally get to marry the one who loves me for the rest of my life... :)